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EXODUS Father Brian Doerr revbdoerr@priestforever.org Copyright 2015 1. Overvie

EXODUS Father Brian Doerr revbdoerr@priestforever.org Copyright 2015 1. Overview 3. Encouragement 4. Testimonials 2. Starting “And behold, two men talked with him, Moses and Elijah, who appeared in glory and spoke of his Exodus, which he was to accomplish at Jerusalem [where he was to suffer]” (Luke 9:30-31). 1. OVERVIEW: The Exodus Program “Let my son go that he may love me” (Exodus 4:23). T he Exodus program was developed at Mount St. Mary’s Seminary by young men who, having been raised in an over-sexualized society, longed for a more perfect personal freedom as they anticipated service in the Church. These were good men; men who had already decided that, in response to God’s call, they would give themselves entirely to the work and ministry of the Church. Nonetheless, the freedom required for such an endeavor was limited by destructive habits that would prevent the realization of this worthy goal. Perhaps some would find this scandalous: men studying for the priesthood who struggled with such base inclinations. They made the lament of the Lord their own prayer: “Let my son go that he may love me” (Exodus 4:23). Yet, if one would but consider that these men (so acutely attuned to the freedom granted in chastity) struggled, what about other men, like those preparing for marriage, who may also be in need of a life giving and liberating spiritual exercise? Not every man has habitually succumbed to the temptations of the flesh, but nearly every man struggles to remain chaste. Our culture has become a major stumbling block to many men. Even those unaffiliated with the church or another religion, find themselves helplessly in trouble. Countless websites dedicated to overcoming Pornography Induced Erectile Dysfunction have appeared almost overnight. And, even as the culture has for many years attempted to convince men that pornography and masturbation are “normal and healthy,” men know better. In the words of a wise old man, “Every boy knows it is wrong, that is why he locks the door before doing it.” Men, spiritual or not, know that sexual activity outside of marriage reduces personal freedom, destroys his contentment, and diminishes his natural power. A man who is not free is a man who cannot love, and a man who cannot love is no man at all. T he goal of Exodus is to achieve the freedom necessary to fully engage the love of God and the love of neighbor. The freedom sought by men accepting the Exodus challenge is not limited to sexual liberty, but also the enslavement to countless temptations advanced by the culture: materialism, narcissism (selfishness), alcoholism, and most significantly, spiritual coldness. Exodus is based on a challenging 90-day period of purification, a dying to self, which is supported by a fraternity of like- minded men for greater interior freedom and, eventually, a more purified and selfless love. The experience is fantastic for those discerning a vocation, for men preparing for marriage, for men struggling with an addiction of any kind (in conjunction with counseling or a Twelve Step program), or for a man who has difficulty finding God and desires to radically unite himself to his Heavenly Father. The work of Exodus is effective for the realization of overall self-mastery and openness to the will and mystery of God. Exodus is not a program of penance and self-abasement. It is a program for men who seek, together, to strive for more perfect FREEDOM. This is the cornerstone of the exercise and much will be lost if that is forgotten. We highly recommended, as much as possible, that nothing be changed in Exodus. The ‘need to control’ is one of the major reasons men fail while seeking to be chaste. Most men, when invited to join Exodus, are filled with fear and anxiety – the first step is overcoming the loss of control and giving it to God. Research has determined the chemistry in a man’s brain can be altered [and returned to a more natural state] in a period of 90 days. No matter the addiction, if a man can abstain from the habitual activity for a period of 90 days, he is afforded a good amount of new and life-giving freedom. There is no magic. Suffering will be required. He is not automatically granted a perfect self-mastery without further struggle, even after 90 days. But the freedom he enjoys can be the basis of a new and revitalized life in Christ. From that point, he can remain free and continue to grow in personal freedom (although it always remains a possibility, if he is careless, he can sabotage his success and return to his former slavery). The studies for these assumptions are numerous: “…researchers have found that it takes about 90 days - the length of many rehabilitation models, including AA, for the brain to “reset” itself. A Yale University study found that after an addict has abstained for at least 90 days, the brain gradually returns to its natural decision-making and analytical functions” (All in Our Heads: How the Brain Creates Addiction; Meghan O’Dell). CAUTION: “Let my son go that he may love me” (Exodus 4:23). T CM happily offers this program to its readers. Do not consider this a chastity program, as such. The program is a means for self-mastery and greater interior freedom. We know from much experience, if engaged properly, the program truly works. This must be kept in mind during the exercise when the temptation to abandon the program becomes too overwhelming. In addition, the men who have successfully completed the 90 days have all, entirely, identified the fraternal nature of the exercise as the key to their success. Brotherhood is essential to Exodus success. Caution: Although we are enthusiastic about the Exodus program, Those Catholic Men, Inc. makes no claims to a man’s individual success in overcoming addiction to pornography or any other addiction. Exodus employs time honored competencies of the Church, including fraternity, asceticism and prayer. Personal success depends on the individual’s investment and commitment. Exodus is an assist toward internal freedom. Many excellent programs exist for personal freedom. Be intentional. Choose a program and see it through to the end. If you find additional assistance of a psychological nature is needed, we recommend the following resources: http://www.catholictherapists.com/ or http://www.integrityrestored.com/ Or check out the support section at www.exodus90.com/support 2. STARTING: Five Steps to Beginning Exodus Step One: Forming Your Accountability Group. Y ou will need to form a fraternity which will consist of, at best, four men and a spiritual director. The small size of the group is necessary for accountability and is essential fraternal bonding. This will likely present the first hurdle of the Exodus program as nobody wants to approach a friend, a colleague or a relative with the awkward question, “Dude, you want to join a chastity group?” But a dose of reality is good here. Pornography and masturbation addiction is pandemic in today’s society. Moreover, men, having failed more times than they care to admit, are more and more inclined to despair. Pornographers are wicked and sly and have learned how to introduce their wares to unassuming men. The truth is, you do not have to look for pornography; pornography will come looking for you. Pornographers know the younger a boy is when he is first exposed to pornography, the more addicted he will be in adulthood. You may, with great confidence, assume that the men in your life are secretly and desperately struggling to overcome these unwelcome habits and struggles. There are always exceptions, but if you approach a man with respect and concern, he may very well thank you and welcome your intervention. But even more, most men desire to be better. Rarely is a man so satisfied with present day mediocrity or the sometimes meaningless lives we live that he does not, at the very least, express some interest in self-improvement. Books on self-improvement are sold by the truckload. Men are also busy today and may need much in the way of encouragement to even consider something as radical as Exodus. On the other hand, it is a program of only 90 days; the disciplines will not last forever. In the end, he may find himself in a much better place and ready to live a life more pleasing to himself, to his family and to his Savior. Step Two: Spiritual/Accountability Meetings. I n a perfect Exodus setup, the brothers would meet three times a week for 30 minutes per meeting. The importance of these meetings cannot be overemphasized, but will need to be adapted to the needs of the local participants. Skype is a possibility, but the participants will need to be disciplined and not compromise on these meetings. The meeting agenda will include discussion of accountability (only necessary details), mutual encouragement, contemplation of Jesus Christ, discussion of humility, prayer and a healthy vision of freedom. Ideally, the brothers of the group will set the time and the day for these meetings. The meetings allow for uploads/Societe et culture/ exodus-father-brian-doerr.pdf